No Reason Left
by Eyes-of-Crimson
Summary: OneShot, HieiBotan, Hiei shook his head, trying to make the bad memories go away. But they wouldn’t. They would never go away. All the sadness and pain and death in his life was just too much to ignore.


**A/N:** I just got a Creed CD, and I was listening to "Hide" and I got this idea. I named Hiei and Botan's child Vincent 1) I love that name, 2) It sounded cool, and 3) It's Hiei's Tagalog (?) name.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own YYH or its characters. I only own Vincent :3

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No Reason Left**

"Hey, Hiei, how're you doing?" a concerned voice questioned. The demon twitched his ear with recognition.

"Fine." he stated. Botan's violet-pink eyes saddened, and she sat beside him. Hiei didn't bother to get nearer to her, partly because he was down and partly because she had leant against his shoulder. Usually, his bandaged arm would come up to wrap around his mate's petite shoulders, but today it stayed around his pulled-up knees.

"You don't sound fine." Botan argued, slipping on arm to hook with Hiei's. Hiei forced back a sigh.

"I'm fine. Really." he tried to reassure. Botan didn't buy it. She picked her head off his shoulder, brushing her lips against his cheek. Hiei's only response to this was an even more devastated look in his ruby-red eyes.

"Hiei…I'm worried. Tell me what's wrong, sweetie. Please." Botan pleaded, now hugging his arm tightly to her chest. Hiei blinked, and looked at her. Her long, silky blue hair was pulled back into a pony-tail, and her amethyst eyes were begging for him to reply. On normal days, Hiei would kiss her pink lips, but right now, all he wanted was for her to smile and get rid of that look in her eyes.

"I…I'm fine, Botan. Just…just thinking…" he said, trailing off, and touching his forehead to hers. Botan's lower lip stuck out.

"Hiei…" she whined softly. Hiei forced a smirk, and he kissed the tip of her nose.

"Botan, I'm alright. Why don't you go check up on Vincent?" he suggested. Botan sighed sadly, knowing that the father of their child was only forcing the content tone in which he was speaking. But, she kissed his lips gently.

"Okay. Just…try not to think too much anymore. It hurts to see you so down, Hiei." she told him. Hiei smirked a bit wider, placing a kiss on her own lips.

"Whatever you say, Botan."

Botan felt like crying at his voice. He sounded so depressed, and the forced happy in his tone didn't make her feel any better. She threw her arms around him, giving him one last, tight hug before leaving to go check on their baby boy.

Hiei didn't like lying to Botan. But inside, he knew that telling the truth would only hurt her more. Before Botan had given birth, Hiei was almost never alone. Now that Vincent had been born, Botan was with him more, giving Hiei more time by himself. He sighed, closing his eyes and hiding his face in his knees.

Being alone used to be such a good thing.

Now that he had a family, consisting of Botan, Vincent, and Yukina and Kuwabara's family, he was around others more. The times with them never let him wander back into his memories and get lost in his dark thoughts. The times without them practically made him think of all the disaster and dread in his life. Soon, Hiei had fallen to depression again, only this time striking his human emotions tragically.

Human emotions. Things he thought he'd never have. But now, he was married to Botan (they had gotten married in a human church, where Hiei had felt the most out-of-place in his entire life), had a child, a niece, and a nephew on the way. He was in love. He was _insanely_ in love. Yusuke didn't help the situation much, every so often teasing him about it all; only for his wife, Keiko, to come barging in and whacking him upside the head with whatever object in reach.

Funny enough, times with all of his teammates were fun. Little children running around, jokes being told, memories being looked back upon, and laughs being shared. Life at this point was the best Hiei could remember or want. But, there were always things that hit his emotion-wall hard.

Like Kurama's death, for example.

That was always a topic that would send Hiei to the darkest, most melancholic part of his mind and soul. Kurama was actually one of the best things to happen to him in his life. His first friend. His first, real, true friend. Kurama was the first person to save him out of pure kindness, not caring for his reputation. Kurama had been the first for quite a few of the new, human emotions he had. And, Kurama had always been there for him…always.

But Hiei himself could not be there for him.

Kurama, posing as Shuichi, had fallen gravely ill with a nasty flu. And, being that sick and with no one else knowing about special demonic herbs to save him, had died from it. Hiei had not heard the news of the sickness until Kurama was on his death bed. He hadn't been there to say his final goodbye…to bid farewell to the man who changed his life for the better. He wasn't there…

And that's what tore Hiei up from the inside out.

He wasn't there for Kurama after all those times when Kurama was there for him. Hiei was devastated, to say the _very_ least. He didn't think he'd get over it. In truth, he was still not over it. The night Kurama died, Hiei broke into the hospital, and cried at his very corpse.

Hiei shook his head, trying to make the bad memories go away. But they wouldn't. They would never go away. All the sadness and pain and death in his life was just too much to ignore. And, somehow, one woman could make all the memories and flashes of saddening images stop as long as she was nearby. Botan was his salvation.

He didn't know why he had never noticed her before. She was beautiful and had a good personality. Annoying at times, yes, but good nonetheless. Hiei had fallen in love with her, and was delighted when she admitted her love for him. Over the years, they had gotten closer, and one day, at Yusuke's suggestion, asked her to marry him. Now, he had already claimed her as his mate, but Yusuke made the point that humans didn't know about demons or their mating practices and would only recognize their unity if they were to be married. Botan had said yes, with crystalline tears in her amethyst eyes.

Hiei would always remember that moment. Her heartfelt cry of "Yes!" and the tears streaming down her gentle face. And the momentary lack of oxygen when she had hugged him. When they found out that Botan was pregnant, they were both ecstatic; Botan quite loudly, and Hiei quite silently, but both had that glow on their faces.

To be truthful, Hiei never gave children a passing thought. But since Botan had been deemed pregnant, he had to actually ponder on it. Hiei was quite relieved when they found out that they were going to have a boy.

"Easier to train." Hiei had 'explained'. Yes, he had high hopes for Vincent as a warrior. After all, he was already tearing up his bath toys with his hands alone.

"This is definitely your child, Hiei." Botan had joked when Vincent had viciously attacked a plastic grocery bag, tearing it to shreds, only laughing at it when he was done. Hiei remembered laughing at that comment, and then taking his son into his arms.

Hiei smirked. Those were good memories. Better than the old ones he used to dwell on. He stood up, and fixed his black tank top to fit better, smoothing it out. He sauntered back into the house, pausing only to look at a picture of him and Kurama that Yusuke took. Kurama had taken them to go see the available children to adopt in Makai, saying that he wanted to make sure that his child could put up with his two best friends. Yusuke had laughed, and Hiei had rolled his eyes with a smirk.

That day, Kurama didn't find one he liked, which actually shocked him and Yusuke both. Kurama had looked at them, and smiled that unforgettable smile, saying:

"None of them had the potential to be better than I. That's all."

Hiei had not understood that one bit then, but now as he was planning out Vincent's training, he understood it completely.

It was a father's dream for his son to surpass them.

He wanted Vincent to be faster than him, to be stronger than him. He wanted his son to avoid the mistakes he had made in life, and to not be as lost as he was. Hiei closed his eyes, giving a small nod.

"Kurama, you were wise beyond your kitsune years." he muttered. Hiei walked on, going to the kitchen to grab something to snack on. He found Botan feeding Vincent the apricot baby food that he seemed to love. Hiei smirked and decided to sneak up behind Botan. Vincent paused his laughing at stared at his father. He was about to yell out, "Daddy! Daddy," but Hiei put his finger to his lips, pointing to Botan.

Vincent looked between his daddy and his mommy, who was feeding him and oblivious, and smiled at Hiei, laughing. Hiei nodded, and crept up behind his wife/mate, eyeing her sides. As Botan set down the jar, Hiei grabbed her sides, tickling her. Botan went into a gigantic fit of laughter, squirming around until she jumped back into Hiei's arms. Botan stopped and looked up at him, smiling.

"See? I'm fine, hon." Hiei told her, kissing her lips tenderly. Botan smiled again, and turned in his arms.

"Alright. I believe you." she replied, kissing him. Hiei returned it, wrapping his arms lovingly around her waist. Just as they began using their tongues, a loud sound of glass breaking rang in the room. Botan spun around, worried immensely about her baby boy. Vincent, grinning much like his father, laughed and pounded his tiny fists on the plastic surface. The shards of the baby food jar were scattered across the floor, and so was some of the food itself.

Hiei laughed while Botan scolded Vincent. Vincent, having no idea what his mother was saying, laughed and pointed at her. Botan huffed.

"You're just like your father, Vinny!" she said exasperatedly. Hiei chuckled, and picked Vincent up from his high chair, kissing his forehead.

"He is? I don't remember pushing baby food jars off my high-chair table and laughing at your scoldings, Botan." he mocked, sounding quite serious. Vincent laughed harder, finding the mocking funny. Botan sighed and pouted at them both. Both boys shut up. "Oh, come on, Botan! I was joking!"

"So?" Botan continued to pout. Vincent gave Hiei the "you made mommy sad or mad, I don't know but you made her unhappy" look. Hiei blinked at his son's crimson eyes, suddenly being reminded of how wordy Kurama's eyes were.

"Honey, I was joking around, okay? Here, I'll clean up, you go give Vincent his b-a-t-h." he offered, holding out the baby to Botan. Botan sighed then smiled, taking her son lovingly into her arms.

"Alright. We'll be in the B-A-T-H-room if you need us." she said, winking. She kissed Hiei's cheek, and made Vincent do the same before leaving Hiei alone with the mess. Hiei chuckled, and used his Jagan powers to pick up the shards, making them fall into his palm. The Jagan glowed still beneath the bandanna, now wanting to get more 'exercise'. As Hiei finished cleaning up, he remembered the slit in his son's forehead.

That was going to most likely become a Jagan eye, but they weren't exactly sure yet. It might have just been a substitute for the real thing since Hiei's was implanted. Hiei shrugged, and ventured back upstairs to the bathroom, where Botan was soaking wet and Vincent was playing happily in the bath water, tearing up the toys yet again.

_This is my life now._ Hiei thought, coming in and kneeling next to Botan.

_I shouldn't think about those memories anymore._ He picked up the only toy Vincent had failed to shred, and teased him with it.

_I've got a family now. _Botan laughed while Vincent began to pout.

_And I love them. _Hiei then put the toy in Botan's face so suddenly, that she made a loud "Eep!" and fell back.

_There's no reason left to hide from these feelings, yet there is no reason left to fear those memories. _Vincent and Hiei both laughed as Botan blushed intensely.

_Kurama...you've told me that life is like a battle. _Hiei pulled Botan back up, giving her an apologetic kiss on the lips.

_Where every memory is a scar, and every scar is a memory._ Botan smiled at him and continued to play with Vincent, who was laughing joyously.

_We're both covered in scars, but I more than you._ Hiei watched, and handed the still-in-one-piece toy to Botan to tease their son with.

_And everyday I'll think about you and the lessons you've taught me._ He closed his eyes, resting his cheek in his hand, a content smirk on his face.

_And every wise word you've said to me._ He could hear splashes, and sweet whispers from Botan, a little giggle in there, too.

_Kurama, you'll never be forgotten, no matter how much it hurts to remember you._ Hiei heard his name, and opened his eyes, only for the toy to be shoved in _his_ face.

_So, I hope you're happy wherever you are._ He almost fell back, giving a shocked yell, his eyes wide and his wife and child laughing their butts off.

_Because I know I am._ Hiei blinked for a bit, and joined in the laughing, putting one arm around Botan and his hand on Vincent's black-haired head.

End


End file.
